Romance and torture

“This is so romantic.” My niece MayTay is pulling at her tooth when she says this.

Sometimes I don’t understand romance and love, but I’m sorry MayTay, there is nothing romantic about pulling out a tooth.

I was trying to vacuum the floor when she came up with romantic tooth-pulling. I let her continue with her charade and probably encouraged it when I lied to her. “I heard that if you leave a dollar for the tooth fairy with your tooth, he’ll leave you five.”

She started jumping up and down after this. “I’m going to leave a two dollar bill and get…” She’s six. She’s not quite into multiplication yet.

“You’re ridiculous,” I said when she continued to pester me while I was rearranging the furniture.

She came back with, “It’s important to get money, you know.” Yes, Madelyn. I knew this. I’ve been searching for jobs for quite some time. I know the importance of money to one’s survival in the world.

When I finally finished vacuuming and all the furniture was back in place, it was time to help her pull out the tooth. I got the floss and she pulled out a string as tall as she was. “Woa! I’m unemployed, chica. Get your own floss!” She was too excited to think about what I said and she started tackling the tooth.

After about a minute, I said, “Hold on, Maddie,” and checked her mouth. The tooth was not loose. It wasn’t even moving a little bit. “Um, Maddie. The tooth isn’t ready. It’s bleeding because it’s hurt.”

I think she was a bit bummed out by this. I know three dollars seems like a lot of cash to a six-year-old, but it’s not worth the pain of pulling out a perfectly healthy tooth.

Oh – and here’s some artwork from the whole affair. Enjoy.


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